Review of Maybe You Should Talk
We have decided to add a book review section to our newsletter upon occasion that relates to themes around death, dying, and bereavement. I did not quite realize exactly how many books are related to these topics. I thought I would have to search harder, but the books keep falling across my path.
Recently, I was playing Wingspan online with a friend who lives in Washington State, and she mentioned the book she was currently reading. She and I often enjoy the same books, so I knew I had to reserve Maybe You Should Talk to Somone by Lori Gottlieb through the Libby library app.
This book is considered a genre I have never seen before: Memoir/Self-Help. I wholeheartedly agree with this label. I felt entertained, deeply moved, and self-reflective. I was never bored, and it was challenging to motivate myself to do things other than read this 835-page tome. Since I read the last page, I miss the author’s voice and the clients she so thoroughly captures on the pages.
Gottlieb toggles back and forth throughout the book between her own individual therapy after an unexpected break-up (loss again!), as well as the clients she sees in her private practice. It is such a pleasure to see all the people depicted change and grow even when those changes are tiny.
We follow the story of a young cancer patient and all the loss that follows such a journey. We are stunned to see the death of a child in a car accident and the grief of the surviving parents. We see people who are emotionally inaccessible become less armored and why they put on defenses in the first place. We see people who have lived long lives riddled with mistakes and the hurt that is sometimes born from them. We see people grow up and take responsibility for their own actions or inaction. We see people own their emotional baggage and turn their lives around. Ultimately this is a book about finding meaning in all our moments no matter how close we are to our own mortality.
Many people wonder how we who work in funeral service can do what we do each day; they wonder if it is too depressing. For me it is often sad and reminds me how important it is to choose life and to live each moment as we don’t know how long we get. Working with death and the bereaved helps me to remember how critical it is to make positive use of my time on earth.
I am working towards being less afraid that my life is likely more than half over. This work has me thinking about my bucket list, what is on yours? Following the next funeral, memorial, or celebration of life you attend I invite you to really reflect on how you are living your one precious life, right now. Thanks, Mary Oliver.
I hope you will consider reading. Maybe You Should Talk to Someone to give you a little perspective. You know what they say, use it or lose it.
